Drinking in public. It varies from stupefied alcoholics, to lads enjoying a beer in the summer-sun, to this guy walking towards me. Between Potsdamer Platz and the Brandenburger Tor. He’s twenty-something wearing tee/jeans/sneakers. Unremarkable. Carrying a bottle of alcohol in each hand. He takes a wild swig from one, then a more restrained gulp from the other. It’s only as he’s just passing I can see what the bottles contain and realize what he’s doing. A bottle of gin. A bottle of vermouth. He’s making a martini in his mouth. Swilled, not shaken or stirred.

No time to get home? No glass? Or no third bottle to mix it in even? Probably not the epitome of sophistication that the classic dry martini traditionally conjures, but creative none the less. Yes, you have to give it to him for inventiveness. I keep expecting him to take an olive from his pocket and flick it into the air.

It gets me wondering as people walk towards me, what other mouth-mixers could work? Whisky and water obviously. Whisky on the rocks (should you want to lug around a bag of ice). But a couple of great recipes spring to mind.

 

RUSSIA: COLD WEATHER, WARM VODKA

Screwdriver—The Classic Highball

Ingredients:

1 small portion of vodka

1 large portion of orange juice (freshly squeezed, organic is best)

 

Instructions:

Forget the highball glass—that’s what your mouth is for. Take one small gulp of vodka, let it sit a minute, then open wide, tilting head back slightly to the sky and pour in a liberal amount of oj. Have some ice handy? Keep your mouth open and toss a couple of cubes in the air. Catch. Mix till combined. Swallow. Better not swallow those ice cubes though, huh?

It’s fresh, works perfectly for brunch and also well in the evening.

 

 

 

The Margarita—Mexico’s Perfect Cocktail

Ingredients:

1 small portion of tequila

1 large portion of margarita mix

1 lime wedge

1 small bag of salt

ice (optional)

 

Instructions:

A shaker? A strainer? A sieve? A cocktail glass? Are you kidding?

First chill your mouth (the easiest way is to fill it with ice). Run a lime chunk around the outside rim of your mouth and wedge it firmly in your teeth. Admittedly this can look a bit stupid, but the effort is worth it.

Dip your finger in salt and rub liberally over your lips.

Gulp one small portion of tequila and quickly follow with a larger pour of margarita mix. Close your mouth and swill around bringing those flavors together in orgasmic fusion. Bite on lime and swallow (the alcoholic beverage, not the lime).

Tip: Push ice to front of your teeth and suck back to strain. You can spit ice out when done.

 

I’m actually only just getting started. Pina colada? Mojito? The possibilities are endless… and well, mouthwatering.